Friday, July 29, 2011

25 arrested in police sweep

BREAKING NEWS: 25 people were arrested for slow walking speeds due to smartphone use in an islandwide operation by the police to curb congestion along crowded walkways.

The police operation follows an increasing number of smartphone thefts and vandalism due to frustration caused by inconsiderate smartphone users.

Smartphones are portable devices that require a higher level of intellect and attention span to operate.

"When such requirements are not met, the usual situation would be the slowing of movement as the user tries to operate their smartphone while walking," said Professor Stating Obviously from the University of Life Science.

In a society known for it's hotheadedness, inpatience and total lack of respect, the new police ruling may be a godsend.

But the close to 80% of the populace with smartphones, of which 60% have been guilty of being stupid and stopping abruptly while using their smartphones in transit, saw red with the new ruling.

Perhaps if a school child was hit by a car while looking at her smartphone, the sentiments would be different.

For now, the police advises all singaporeans to be considerate while using smartphones, or face a jail sentence.

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