It's an impulse... something we do without thinking, bordering on the brink of instinctual behavior.
Yet it is this instinct thwt we want to move away from and cast ourselves into another realm of being, one so unreal it makes me want to tear myself apart.
To the contrary, I've gotten better at thinking without a brain, and at times it brings me all manner of regretable behavior.
To grant material to a moment's foolish thinking would eventually lead to my eventual dowbfall. Cliched, but true... There is a God.
I never meant for it to be driven by a motive greater than a moment's spur, and I never meant for it to cut so deep. But it has and now I must pay the consequence.
It is not foolish to trust; the fool is one who misplaces given trust.